The Queens of K-Town by Angela Hur

Author:Angela Hur [Young Hur, Angela mi]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-1-59692-954-8
Publisher: M P Publishing Limited
Published: 2007-01-15T00:00:00+00:00

“Cora, where’d you go?” asked Simon.

“We can still have sex.”

“You said that already.”

“It helps me sleep afterward.”

He sighed. “Then why take my pills?”

“Okay, sex helps me fall asleep for like thirty minutes, and then I need something stronger than an orgasm to knock me out. Shut my brain up. I know it shouldn’t matter, but I haven’t had a good night’s sleep in a month, and I want to leave a pretty corpse.”

“Don’t land face down then.”

“Thanks. I’m not an idiot.”

“So, Cora…” he began.

“Yes, Simon?”

“Why now? Why kill yourself now, after you just got here and we’ve just met?”

“No offense, but it has nothing to do with you. You’re not the reason, and you’re not going to be the thing that stops me either. You’re courteous and bald and good in bed, but not worth living for.”

“Then why?”

“Because I’m tired of being sad. Because other people make it look so easy. And to be honest, it’s because I’ve been too busy obsessing over the small stuff, like why doesn’t he love me? And why am I in Indiana? And now that I don’t think about that stuff anymore, I can think about the real things, like god and death, why people suffer, how to get a job, and then the solution is so simple, because everything else is so impossible.”

“Wait, you called love the small stuff,” he said, reading from his notes. “You said, ‘Why doesn’t he love me’ was small stuff.”

“That was just my ego talking. The real problem is, why can’t I love as much as I should. Never mind the ex business. I haven’t thought about much of consequence until now. And I can’t stop busting my head over it—the things that most kids think about in college and then put away until they’re on their deathbeds.”

“You can’t stop thinking about it now all of a sudden?”

“Especially when I’m talking with you,” she said, more annoyed than anything.

“What do you mean?”

“When I was in Indiana, it was like being away from everything I knew, and everything could be explained simply by saying they’re white and I’m not. Thank god. But now that I’m with you, I can’t use that excuse anymore. Don’t get me wrong, there were plenty of racist hicks in Indiana, and I was one of them too. A lot of the times, I just wanted to pretend that any disconnect or what-the-fuckness I felt was because of race. This is all very clear to me now.”

“What about your boyfriend?”

“Ex-boyfriend,” said Cora. “Oh, he meant well. Nice boy. I probably put him through hell. He’ll miss me when I’m gone though. I’m going to undress now.”

She got naked and lay back on the couch, turning her back to Simon so she could look out his window. They were so high up, she could pretend she was anywhere.

“I think maybe me being Asian is also a hobby I’ll quit pretty soon,” she mused. “I remember when I used to be a little black child, and I can’t wait to be an old Jewish man.

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